Thursday, December 13, 2007


Thanks for the encouraging comments and responses. Please forgive me for my bad English I try to improve though. Rather than writing a Social Study or Language Development essay, I prefer to express myself here. Here is the second part of the story.

Intan after SPM-DECEMBER 2004-2005

After we finished our SPM, both of us move back to our hometown. We were closer than before and I’m more than excited because we can meet and I was planning to tell her what I feel towards her and I was pretty sure she would be mine. But almost a month after SPM I haven’t made any move because I think I don’t have the guts to do so. Our relationship was going really well. In the mid-December, I asked her out for the 1st time, to Sungai Petani of course, she agreed but cancelled it last minute because she had some problems. So we delayed it, and it happens for several times, I don’t know why but it happens because either she or me cant make it. In January, she took a driving course; so she was busier, and we cant go out. And after a while, I realized that our relationship was not as before, it turned a bit sour. She was busy, always didn’t reply my messages, sometimes she didn’t answered my call. She always gave excuse such as busy and tired. So before things get worse, I decided to confess my feelings through SMS. She didn’t reply, so I jump into conclusion that she was not in love with me. Heart broken, I told her that it is okay that we still can be best friend. After that, she pretends that she didn’t know anything about that thing. We continue as a friend, but I felt that it was not going really well because I think she changed gradually after SPM, less talk and messages. Frustrated, I asked her why she changed, the way she treated me was so differently compared to our early days. I asked her, for her I’m only her friend or what. She replied that she never feels that I’m more than her friend. Then I asked her, what did she mean by sending me ‘143’ message, calling me ‘sayang’ and ‘abang’. She replied ‘saje main-main’. Can you imagine how I felt at that time? It really hurts, until today. It was in mid-March, even I was hurt, I don’t want to give up easily, and I still want to capture her heart. I stop messaging her, not because I want to forget her but I was planning to give her a big surprise on her birthday, 13 April. I was planning to go to her house, ask her out and give her a birthday present and cake. That was my idea to give her big surprise on her birthday. On 13 April 2005, I went to her house (it is quite rural) with my best friend, gave her a surprise call and asked her to come out because I have something for her. Sadly, the thing that I feared most happened, she refused to come out. She said that she was not ready to meet me. I was so sad and broken hearted, I planned and prepared everything, sacrificed my money, time and energy. I was so sad and when I arrived home, I can’t control myself, I burst into tears. That was the first time I cried because of a girl. She gave me a call, apologized and she told me that she was shocked, that’s all. And she asked me, “Are we still friend?” So I said, the ball is in your court so you made the decision. She promised to repair our relationship. I have no complaint but deep in my heart, I was more than hurt. Not long after that, she started to show her dark side. She started to ignore my messages and phone call. She rejected my calls so many times. Until one day I cant reach her anymore. She changed her phone number. It’s hurts to think that the one that you love the most left you, without saying good-bye, without telling you why she left. I was left alone in the dark, trying to figure out why, why she left me and what have I done wrong that drove her to act like that. I was half-crazy after that, until I enrolled in M4P (now IPP) that I started to find myself back. And try to forget her; it’s worked, for not more than 30 seconds. To be continue…

[Theme Song]-[Ada Apa Dengan Mu-Peter Pan]

More to come:

What have she done to me

Where is she now?

and many more about me and her, stay tune.

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